Slacker Days

The only thing I accomplished while David was gone was a whole lotta ass-sitting.

I almost felt guilty at first, but then I realized how good it felt. I sat on my ass at home, then I sat on my ass in a movie theater all by myself. Turns out few people go to the movies at noon on a Monday.

My list of goals was ambitious and unfortunately, I only managed to achieve a few of them: wore sweats almost the entire time, did no dishes whatsoever and watched bad TV - The City! The City After Show! Jay is a total lying cheater!

Then there's the ginormous time suck that is the internet - Facebook, Flickr, blogs, news, but mostly Facebook... oh how I love that time vampire.

But today was fairly productive... I bought my tickets and in just over four weeks I'll be on my way to the sun-baked desert where I can damage my skin and float around in the lap pool.

A week later I get to drive up to the Bay Area, stopping at every In & Out along the way, where I will consume gallons of Peet's and eat plates and plates of molé chicken at La Piñata, washed down with buckets of Don Julio on the rocks. I'm so excited I could cry hot tears of sweet tequila.

Statusey

Like my fellow blogsters, I often neglect this medium in favor of screwing around on Facebook.

Because, I mean, there's just so much going on in my life, it's easier to keep everyone informed about critical happenings with quick, updated status messages. They're convenient, single-serving packets of info that everyone can easily digest in seconds.

To illustrate, here's a snapshot of about a week's worth of critical status messages.

• Jennifer says The New Phone Book's Here! The New Phone Book's Here! The sun has come out! He hates these clouds!
• Jennifer likes the sangiovese.
• Jennifer is giddy about the new season of Flight of the Conchords.
• Jennifer thought she knew who the 5th cylon is... but now she's not so sure. [scooby doo noise].
• Jennifer thinks the blues in French sounds stupid. And what would the French know about the blues, anyway, with all that great food, wine and chocolate? Please.
• Jennifer picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.
• Jennifer doesn't want to cause a panic, but there appears to be a Battlestar Gallactica marathon going on (in BC, anyway). It's back tonight! Huzzah!
• Jennifer finds it's easier to work uninterrupted late at night, just like at an office. But I can wear my jammies here. Or a prom dress. Doesn't matter.
• Jennifer is glad everyone got off the plane that landed in the Hudson River.
• Jennifer is suddenly very busy. Drought or firehose - is there *no* middle ground?
• Jennifer is waiting for the bird to shut the hell up. Maybe it's time to drug his birdy pellets.
• Jennifer is off to the Land of Nod.
• Jennifer is amazed that WA passed a law to rename King county for another King. The first one wasn't good enough, eh? Redonkulous.
• Jennifer is learning a new CMS. Mmm... content management. Yummy.
• Jennifer can say she's tried the Take 5 coffee. Meh.
• Jennifer is off to see the wizard. The wonderful wizard of Id.
• Jennifer is bored of the manatee-written 24 scripts. But it was fun to watch Jack punch someone in the face.
• Jennifer just got a little nauseated watching Bush smugly talk about his time in office. Forever a vile douchebag - don't let the door hit you on the way out.
• Jennifer is all excited about King 5 News and her imaginary favorite aunt, Jean Enerson.
• Jennifer is thinking someone spilled a coke on a Facebook server. Shit is sloooooooooow today.
• Jennifer can't decide what to have for breakfast.
• Jennifer is bummed that our sweet weekend is at a close... but happy about Mickey winnin the globe. Springsteen, too!
• Jennifer is going to be a background performer, or selected parts of her, as directed by the director.
• Jennifer is growing increasingly peeved about the Canadian pronunciation of Yahoo. It's not yeah-hoo - it's YAH-hoo - get it right. It's not Cah-neah-duh, is it?
• Jennifer would like to have a word with the jet stream.
• Jennifer loves that The Wrestler was written by a former Onion Editor in Chief. Loved the movie. More Mickey!
• Jennifer is going to see The Wrestler... I've missed that rascal Mr. Roarke. Wait, not *that* Mr. Roarke. "De plane!"
• Jennifer says "It's "more important," not "more importantly!" Yeeeeaaaaaaaaooooooo!

As you can see, it's a wonder I found a spare few minutes to make this post. With a dance card this full, it won't be long before I have an intern taking over The Nootsmaak.

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